“In the beginning we all depend on attention and affection from our mother or other caring people. Without loving care we cannot survive, without loving action we miss the meaning of life.” (Love Within, Tina Turner).
As you are all aware it is Mothering Sunday today. If, for some reason, you missed all the promotions and advertising (mine included) then get yourself out there sharpish and buy some flowers for the woman you wish to spoil today.
In addition to the woman who gave you life (just think about that for a minute and acknowledge what that really means – stretchmarks, tearing, care and worry all day every day for 9 months, excitement, tears of joy, love, LIFE!) there is also the Divine Mother within all of us, men and women alike. She (Durga) is the mother of All, the mother of unconditional love, the mother of the Universe helping us develop attributes of love, kindness, compassion, forgiveness and tolerance. It is human nature to take those close to you for granted and I for one am guilty of that some days. Let’s be honest, it’s hard to cherish someone who is quite frankly doing your head in!
At the mature age of 32 I am living with my parents. They are supporting me as I strive to fulfil my dream of teaching yoga and fund a living from that. We three have strong personalities, strong ideas and ideals and a strong attachment to being right. Somewhat surprisingly we are rubbing along rather well but sometimes there will be a niggle and someone pushes someone else’s buttons, someone sulks. According to Buddhist philosophy the answer in these moments is to remove your buttons, not blaming the other person for your reaction and to remember that you are responsible for your own happiness. Each squabble is an opportunity to become aware of your immediate reaction and to try to lean in with love and compassion. We should cherish those we find difficult as they are the ones who bring us the greatest gift – the opportunity to learn the most about ourselves.
It pains me to put the following sentence in writing, on Facebook, on the internet forever: My mother was right. She knows my soul. She said when I was small that I should be a teacher. She encouraged me to be open to spirituality. I stuck my stubborn chin out and ignored that advice for a long time. I imagine one of the hardest parts of being a parent is watching your child stumble through life, ignoring your life experience and not truly connecting to the fact that you love them unconditionally. I know in my heart that Mum loves me unconditionally even if, on occasion, she doesn’t like me very much. Thank you Mum.
Happy Mother’s Day.